trusting a diary more

being an adult, sometimes i trusted no one, and trusting my blog more.

i have a problem. different people give different ideas/solution, which in my view, reflects what they experienced/what they want.
sometimes i cant give full trust on them because they are human, human tend to do things that will give benefit to themselves, and sometimes with less thinking about the consequences to the person with problem. the only person that will think critically of the consequences is me. i am responsible of my own happiness. i need to think this way, but keep this to myself, if not my way of thinking will be regarded as selfish.

rasa sedih, rasa tersepit. rasa lost. rasa...takpernah rasa ini akan terjadi. lagi dewasa, lagi banyak liku. lagi besar ujian.

taktahu nak luah pada sape. taktahu nak buat keputusan apa.
rasa takut dan buntu.
rasa nak lari, tapi takboleh, sebab kaki dah diikat. aku ada anak yang masih kecil. rasa nak buat keputusan yang menggembirakan diri, tapi untuk masa panjang, anak yang kecil akan menuntut.

tanggungjawab.
Allah, suluhkan aku jalan.

social skills

1

Pay attention to your body language. Bodies often communicate messages more powerfully than words. ^[2] Remember that body language plays an important role in most social interactions. Reflect on the messages you are sending to others through your posture, gestures, eye contact, and facial expressions.

·         If you are avoiding eye contact, standing far away, or crossing your arms, you are likely telling others that you don't want to interact. ^[3]

·         If you adopt a confident stance, smile, make eye contact, stand upright, and uncross your arms, you are more likely to make a good impression.

2

Observe others in social situations. Watch the kind of body language they use in successful social interactions. Take note of their posture, gestures, facial expressions, and eye contact. Consider how you might replicate or improve upon their use of body language in your own life.

·         Determine the type the relationship between the people you are observing. This is important because the body language between close friends might be inappropriate between strangers.

·         Try taking notes about what you see. This will act as a guide and help you to become more aware of your own body language.

3

Improve your non-verbal communication skills at home. Try video-recording yourself in conversation, and consider how your body language might be improved. Also practice non-verbal communication in front of a mirror. Enlisting the help of friends is another effective approach, as they can provide feedback.

·         One of the best things about practicing at home is that it is a private and low-pressure environment.

·         Don't be afraid to be silly! Have fun trying out different types of body language.

my clinic

Klinik Pergigian DentalSpa (amboi2)

deposit sewa kedai + sewa for few months : RM10000
set up clinic(basic)                                      : RM100000
Instruments + materials                               : RM10000
Gaji receptionist/assistant for 3 months        : RM4500
pendaftaran + miscellaneous                        : RM25500

Total : RM 150 000

sukahati aku je buat kira2 dan tentukan harga coz i want to look at it as real. haha..kalau rege sebenar xdenye gini =p

things a mother could do

i wanted to share with you how long did i wanted to be a mother, and do the best i can for that little child of mine. but actually i was too shy to tell people how much i dreamt of doing duties as mother.

but once i am, its actually quite tough.

but what i wanted to share with you was actually what a petty mother like me can do. i took 2 months unpaid leave for breastfeeding, without the help of husband because he is actually paying fees by himself for his studies. he cant afford me being unpaid. At the same time, we rented a very nice house in a glamourous neighborhood which now the house owners are usually elderly( they bought those houses long time ago when it was cheaper). My plan was to bring up the child in a good environment and to care for my emotions and well-being at a nice place. so that i can care for another life perfectly. The rental is very expensive. Then i planned to send my baby to a nursery which staff are nurses. Expensive.
Those unpaid leave, rental and nursery are all very perfect, and expensive. my salary wasnt really high. can u imagine how did i live during that time? i cut everything i can to have money to pay for everything.even soap was expensive to me that time. i wont buy..basically anything unless i can die without it.

i think i got what i want..but i missed something else.
life is never being fair.
you need to change the way you think, in order to be happy.eventhough you could be unhappy.
life is full of secrets.

expectation lost its way

a women was brave enough...
to tell him that she likes him
he like it too

being a mother has taken my life. i was being very judgemental to myself.
i dont wanna make mistake. i dont wanna be this, i dont wanna be that.
i am tired. the world is only about me and my son.
and he walked away from our world.

KWSP

aku baru g kwsp. since aku dah tukar tempat kerja dan akan sah jawatan dalam masa yg agak lama...so kwsp aku akan kutip duit aku lagi dalam few years lagi (lama!)

ok so...aku nak menggunakan duit kwsp aku sebaiknya. pegawai tadi explain baik punya. (orang sekarang ni bagus2 lah!) basically duit kwsp (akaun 2) boleh dikeluarkan sama ada secara lump sum atau bayaran bulanan. jika telah dikeluarkan lump sum utk rumah pertama, rumah tersebut perlu dijual terlebih dahulu barulah boleh keluarkan lagi lump sum untuk beli rumah lagi. gitu ler.. pastu ansuran bulanan hanyalah boleh dibuat sekali sahaja seumur hidup. gitu peraturannya... jadi aku yg nak keluarkan duit tadi pulanglah tanpa membuat apa2 sebab aku nak fikir kembali mana yg lebih menguntungkan..since ada jugak plan nak beli rumah yg lain...

setakat ni masih boleh survive bayar ansuran bulanan rumah. boringnye xde duit lebih..hmm..

house financing

kalau ada je duit banyak sikit 1000 ke..boleh pergi ke bank dan mintak bayar principal. OK? sebab if lama-lama kita bayar principal, nanti habis principal loan kita maksudnya habislah loan kita.

principal is amount sebenar loan kita tanpa interest.

FYI,

first year loan kita, 650 bulan-bulan aku bayar tu, dia akan pergi dalam 450 ke interest, dalam 200 je bayar principal. itu memang semua bank cenggitu katanya(banker aku jumpa tadi).

thats why, walaupun dah lama bayar, tapi nampak loan kita banyaaak je lagi. caitcitcit punya bank kan. masa apply loan janji suweeet jer.

so, my aim is...ada dlm 10 000 ke, hmm mcm banyak. 5000 lah.. g bank minta bayar principal. bukan banyak pon loan aku. hmm...best hidup ni xde loan. dalam few years lagi insyaAllah i can say goodbye to bankloans.